Below I present one of Seneca's letters to Lucilius, available at The Stoic, a wonderful site about stoicism and responsible for the translations of Seneca's letters. At the end I added several reflections to deepen the content of the letter.
Greetings from Seneca to Lucilius.
- You want to know whether Epicurus is right when, in one of his letters, he rebukes those who maintain that the wise man is self-sufficient and therefore does not need friendships.[1] This is the objection raised by Epicurus against Stilpus and those who believe that the highest good is an insensitive and impassive soul.
- We are limited to finding a double meaning if we try to briefly express the Greek term apatheia (ἀπάθεια) in a single word, taking it for the Latin word impatientia (impatience). Because it can be understood in the opposite direction to what we want it to have. What we mean is a soul that rejects any sense of evil, but people will interpret the idea as that of a soul that cannot bear any evil.[2] Consider, therefore, whether it is not better to say “an invulnerable soul, which cannot be offended" or "a soul entirely beyond the realm of suffering".
- There is this difference between us and the other school:[3] our ideal sage feels his problems, but overcomes them; their wise man does not even feel them. But we and they have this idea, that the wise man is self-sufficient. However, he wants friends, neighbors and associates, no matter how sufficient he is in himself.
- And realize how self-sufficient he is; for now and then he can be content with just a part of himself. If he loses a hand through illness or war, or if some accident injures one or both eyes, he will be satisfied with what remains, taking as much pleasure in his weakened and mutilated body as he did when he was healthy. But while he doesn't complain about these missing members, he prefers not to lose them.
- In this sense, the wise man is self-sufficient, he can do without friends, but he does not want to be without them. When I say “may,” I mean this: he grieves the loss of a friend with equanimity. But he never lacks friends, for it is in his own control how soon he will make up for the loss. Just like Phidias,[4] if he lost a statue he would immediately carve another, just as our skill in the art of making friends can fill the place of a lost friend.
- If you ask how anyone can make a friend quickly, I will tell you, as long as we agree that I can pay my debt at once and clear the account, and as far as this letter is concerned, we will be even. Hecato says: “I can show you a potion, composed without drugs, herbs or any witch spell: So that you may be loved, love!”. Now there is great pleasure, not only in maintaining old and established friendships, but also in acquiring new ones.
- There is the same relationship between conquering a new friend and having already conquered one, as there is between the farmer who sows and the farmer who reaps. The philosopher Attalus used to say: “It is more pleasant to make a friend than to keep one, as it is more pleasant for an artist to paint than to have just painted.”. When one is busy and absorbed in his work, the absorption itself gives great pleasure; but when one withdraws one's hand from the completed masterpiece, the pleasure is not so penetrating. From then on, it is the fruits of his art that he enjoys; it was art itself that he enjoyed while painting. In the case of our children, in their youth they produce the most abundant fruits, but in childhood, they were sweeter and more pleasant.
- Let us now return to the question. The wise man, I say, is sufficient as he is, yet desires friends only for the purpose of practicing friendship, lest his noble qualities lie dormant. Not, however, for the purpose mentioned by Epicurus in the letter cited above: “Let there be someone to sit with him while sick, to help him when he is in prison or in need”, but rather so that he can have someone on whose hospital bed he himself can sit, someone prisoner in hostile hands that he himself can free. He who only thinks about himself and establishes friendships for selfish reasons does not think correctly. The end will be like the beginning: if he makes friends with someone who could free him from slavery, at the first noise of the chain, such a friend will abandon him.
- These are the so-called “brigadeiro heaven friendships”[5]; that which is chosen because of its usefulness will be satisfactory only as long as it is useful. That's why prosperous men are protected by troops of friends, but those who have gone bankrupt are left in the midst of vast solitude, their “friends” fleeing the very crisis that is testing their values. This is also why we see many shameful cases of people who, out of fear, desert or betray. The beginning and the end cannot but harmonize. He who begins to be your friend out of interest will also cease friendship out of interest. A man will be attracted to some reward offered in return for his friendship if he is attracted to something in the friendship other than the friendship itself.
- For what purpose, then, do I make a man my friend? In order to have someone I can give my life to, someone I can follow into exile, someone I can stake my own life for and pay back the promise later. The friendship you portray is a bargain and not a friendship. It only considers convenience and looks only at results.
- Without a doubt, a lover's feeling has something similar to friendship, you can call it mad friendship. But while this is true, does anyone love for the sake of profit or promotion or renown? Pure love, free from all other things, excites the soul with desire for the object of beauty, not without the hope of a reciprocal affection. And then? Can a cause that is higher produce a passion that is morally reprehensible?
- You can reply: “We are now discussing the question whether friendship should be cultivated for its own sake”. On the contrary, nothing more urgent requires demonstration, because if friendship must be sought for itself, anyone who is self-sufficient can seek it. “How then," you ask, "Does he look for her?” Precisely as he seeks an object of great beauty, not attracted to it by the desire for profit, nor even frightened by the instability of fortune. He who seeks friendship for self-interested purposes strips it of all its nobility.
- "The wise man if enough”. This phrase, my dear Lucílio, is incorrectly explained by many because they remove the wise man from the world and force him to dwell within his own skin. But we must mark carefully what this sentence means and how far it applies. The wise man is sufficient for a happy existence, but not for mere existence. For he needs much assistance for mere existence, but for a happy existence he needs only a healthy and upright soul, who despises fortune.
- I also want to tell you one of Chrysippus's distinctions, which declares that the wise man desires nothing, while at the same time he needs many things.[6] "On the other hand,” he says, “nothing is necessary for the fool, for he does not understand how to use anything, but he desires everything. "[7] The wise man needs hands, eyes, and many things which are necessary for his daily use; but he lacks nothing. Because desire would imply an unmet need and nothing is necessary to the wise man.
- Therefore, although he is self-sufficient, he still needs friends. He longs for as many friends as possible, not, however, so that he can live happily, for he will live happily even without friends. The highest good does not require any practical assistance from outside. It is developed at home and arises entirely within oneself. If good seeks any portion of itself abroad, it begins to be subject to the game of fortune.
- People might say, “But what kind of existence will the sage have, if he is left friendless when thrown into prison, or when stranded in some foreign nation, or when stranded on a long journey, or when in a desolate place?” His life will be like that of Jupiter who, in the midst of the dissolution of the world, when the gods are confused in unity and nature rests for a while, can withdraw into himself and give himself over to his own thoughts.[8] The wise man will act in the same way: he will withdraw into himself and live with himself.
- As long as he is able to manage his affairs according to his judgment, he will be self-reliant; as long as he marries a wife, he is self-sufficient; while he educates his children, he is self-sufficient; and yet I could not live if I had to live without the society of men. Natural calls, not your own selfish needs, draw you to friendships. For, just as other things have an inherent attractiveness for us, so does friendship. As we hate solitude and long for society, as nature attracts men to one another, there is also an attraction that makes us desirous of friendship.
- Nevertheless, although the wise man may love his friends dearly, often pitting them against himself and putting them before himself, all love will be limited to his own being and he will speak the words that were spoken by himself. Stilpo, whom Epicurus criticizes in his letter. For Stilpus, after his country was captured and his children and wife slain, as he emerged from the general desolation alone and yet happy, spoke as follows to Demetrius,[9] known as the “Besieged City” because of the destruction he brought upon them, in response to the question if he had lost anything: “I have all my possessions with me!"
- This is being a brave and courageous man! The enemy conquered, but Stilpo conquered his conqueror. “I didn't miss anything!” Yes, he forced Demetrius to ask himself whether he himself had achieved anything after all. “My possessions are all with me!” In other words, he did not consider anything that could be taken from him to be a good thing. We marvel at certain animals because they can pass through fire and suffer no bodily harm, but how much more wonderful is a man who marched unharmed and unharmed through fire and sword and devastation! Do you understand now how much easier it is to conquer an entire tribe than to conquer a man? This saying of Estilpo is common with Stoicism; the Stoic can also carry his goods through devastated cities unharmed because he is self-sufficient. He is sufficient to himself: such are the limits he sets for his own happiness.
- But you must not think that our school alone can utter noble words. Epicurus himself, the critic of Stilpo, used similar language. I put it on my credit, although I have already paid off my debt for today. He says: "Whoever does not consider what he has as the broadest wealth is unhappy, even though he is the master of the entire world.”. Or, if the following seems like a more appropriate sentence, why should we translate the meaning and not the mere words: “A man can rule the world and still be unhappy if he does not feel supremely happy.”.
- However, so that you know that these feelings are universal, certainly proposed by nature, you will find this stanza in one of the comic poets:
Unhappy is the one who does not consider himself happy.
Non est beatus, esse qui non putat.[10]
What does the situation you find yourself in matter if it is bad in your own eyes?
- You could say; “If, the rich man, master of many, but slave to greed for more, calls himself happy, will his own opinion make him happy?” It doesn't matter what he says, but what he feels; not how he feels on a specific day, but how he feels at all times. There is no reason, however, for you to fear that this great privilege will fall into unworthy hands; only the wise are satisfied with what they have. The fool is always troubled by discontent with himself.
Keep strong. Stay Well.
[1] NT: See Epicurus, Letters and Principles.
[2] The Greek term ἀπάθεια (Apatheia) literally means “absence of suffering”, hence the term apathy in Portuguese.
[3] NT: That is, cynical school.
[4] Phidias was a famous sculptor from Ancient Greece. His biography is full of gaps and uncertainties and what is taken for granted is that he was the author of two of the most famous statues of Antiquity, the Athena Parthenos and the Olympian Zeus, and that under the protection of Pericles he took charge of the supervision of a vast construction program in Athens, focused on rebuilding the Acropolis, devastated by the Persians in 480 BC
[5] NT: in Latin, almost temporary, good weather.
[6] The distinction is based on the meaning of mouse “being missing” something indispensable, and opus this, “to need” something that one can do without.
[7] NT: See Diogenes Laertius, Lives and doctrines of distinguished philosophers, book VII.
[8] NT: Allusion to the Stoic theory of conflagration (ekpyrosis). According to this Stoic theory, the world would be renewed from time to time, the world would be reduced to fireworks (Logos = Zeus = Universal Intelligence) and all other gods would be swallowed up in this primordial unity. The cosmogonic process would give rise to another world that, for some Stoics, would be a repetition of everything we have experienced. Then everything would happen again, and everyone would be reborn, but (as Seneca said in a letter), without any memory of a previous life. So, if this theory were true, this could be our billionth life, and for us it wouldn't matter, because we wouldn't be aware of it. This theory reflects the Greek conception of eternal return. See George Stock, Stoicism.
[9] NT: Demetrius I (337 BC — 283 BC), surnamed Polyórcetes, was a king of Macedonia. His nickname, “besieged city” (Poliorketes), refers to his military skill in besieging and conquering cities.
[10] Unknown author, perhaps an adaptation from the Greek. Some scholars attribute the verse to Publilio Siro
Seneca: Self-Reliance and Friendship in Letter 9
Stoic philosophy, with its deep roots in the pursuit of wisdom and the pursuit of virtue, brings to light vital questions about self-reliance and the nature of friendships. Letter 9, written by Seneca to Lucilius, offers a substantial treatise on these themes, outlining the Stoic perspective on the self-sufficiency of the wise man and the importance of true friendships in the journey of life.
Self-Reliance and the Invulnerable Soul
Seneca begins the letter by addressing Epicurus' criticism of the idea that the wise man would be self-sufficient and, therefore, indispensable for friendships. The discussion is enriched by the distinction between the Greek interpretation of the term “apatheia” (ἀπάθεια) and its understanding in Stoicism. Seneca highlights the notion of an invulnerable soul, capable of rejecting feelings of evil, rather than an insensitive soul.
The Duality of Stoic Self-Reliance
One of the crucial points presented by Seneca is the duality between self-sufficiency and the need for friendships. While the Stoic sage is able to be content with himself, he also values the presence and practice of friendships. Seneca emphasizes that the wise man does not need friends for his own happiness, but wants them to practice friendship and develop noble qualities.
True Friendships and Utilitarian Relationships
The distinction between authentic friendships and those based on temporary interests is emphasized by Seneca. He highlights the nobility of true friendships, devoid of utilitarian or selfish interests. The wise man seeks genuine friendships, in which he can fully trust, and is willing to sacrifice himself for his friends, not expecting material benefits or favors in return.
The Strength of Inner Serenity
The wise man's ability to face adversity while maintaining his inner serenity is illustrated by Seneca through the example of Stilpo. Even after losing his possessions and loved ones, Estilpo claimed to have lost nothing, demonstrating the wise man's inner strength and ability to remain balanced in the face of difficulties.
Happiness and Self-Sufficiency of the Soul
Seneca reiterates the idea that true happiness is intrinsically linked to self-sufficiency and the practice of true friendships. The wise man is able to withstand adversity and preserve his inner serenity, remaining firm in his values and noble qualities, regardless of external vicissitudes.
Conclusion: Stoic Lessons for Life
Seneca's Letter 9 to Lucilius is a valuable compendium that highlights the fundamental ethical and philosophical principles of the Stoic school. It provides insights into self-reliance, valuing genuine friendships, and the inner strength needed to face life's vicissitudes.
In Seneca's words, the pursuit of Stoic wisdom not only outlines the contours of a virtuous life, but also offers a guide to understanding how we can become more resilient, ethical, and serene amid the complexities of the world.
